shitty friendships

why do i feel guilty when i want to stop being someone's friend? why do i feel like i need to keep being their friend when it drains me emotionally and mentally and physically.... why cant i just say fuck you. you are so toxic for me and you actually make me digress in my healing journey than you think. im tired of you thinking you are the only one helping me when in reality you dont help me at all you make things worst for me and more stressful than needs be. but when i try to not be your friend you start to because someone who is so obsessed with knowing my every movement because you cant get in touch with me. to where is makes me sick to my stomach that someone can act the way you do and see no wrong in it.. you say you understand but when i am trying to set boundaries you act like it is a joke and it makes me hate being your friend even more. and its not that i feel guilty not wanting to be your friend its more of a fear of what you might try to do or how you will act out once i fully block you out of my life i know you are never truly gone. you will go out of your way to stalk me on fake accounts you go out of your way to make up stories to people so they will start to stalk me for you not knowing that your actions are the main reason i am hiding from you and blocked you from everything.. you will make people feel sorry for you but it was all just a plan you have made up.. you play as you are dumb and dont understand when you are full aware that you could legit get arrested for the things that you have done and then think you can get away with it by forcing me to be your friend or you will start to act insane... you have admitted to stalking me and being obsessed with me and when i block you on everything you still make  up new fake accounts to try and message me to the point to where i have called the police to report you even if haven't done anything physically it doesn't mean you aren't capable of it because at this point you have created a lot of stories in your head that aren't even true that's why you try and act like you are my boyfriend when you know i have one and i have told you time and time again that i am not interested in you but you don't take no as an answer and people like you should be locked up... people like you aren't a good friend you are a predator who has an unhealthy obsession with me to where I've changed my number because of you and even moved without telling you my apartment all because you are overly weird and everyone sees it and says it for fuck sakes even your own family calls you out on it and its sickening that you just laugh at the fact you torture me and flare my ptsd you are sickening and need mental help.... i no longer want to be your friend and i will no longer let you make me feel bad or scared to not be your friend. p.s. i fucking hate you