What’s your worth?

Have you ever questioned your worth. Not just to people but in life. Do you ever feel like your just not good enough to love anymore? I question my worst multiple times a day. I ask myself why do I even try anymore. I’m not good enough to be here or even be in anyone’s life. No one would care if I disappeared. The sad thing is I proved to myself that I was right. No one cared when all the sudden I was gone I up and left. It’s been five months and still no one cares to ask me where I went how I am doing or anything like that. If anyone talks to me it’s because I messaged them first. I never get the messages first. I never got asked to hangout or go do anything I was the one always left out. So why do I put myself through the misery of trying to get someone to care for me like I’ve cared for so many. It’s hard to think about but deep down I know I mean nothing to no one and it’s sad to think of but I’m use to it. I’ve always been use to it since I was little. I’ll never be accepted by anyone. But why? Why me? All I’ve ever asked for my whole life is to be apart of “my family” yet my family could give a shit if I went off the face of the earth because they never wanted me to be in their lives just like I don’t want to even be in my life. All because I question my worth everyday has made me a miserable person who is always depressed and questioning if I should live or die. Because my family has never showed they care about me I stopped caring about myself I’ve stopped loving myself.